Over the Rainbow

If the volume on your computer is working, you should be hearing the Hawaiianish version of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow."

I had to add this song to Tommy's website because it is so emotional for me. Let me explain:

Once you hear how sweet this version is sung...you can just tell it's a special song. It's one of those songs that automatically forms a lump in my throat.

Anyway, I had heard this song before a few times, but the first time I really listened to it was right after our failed IVF attempt in July of 2007. It came on at a restauarant Rich and I were eating at, and after about 20 seconds of it, I was crying so hard I had to excuse myself and go to the ladies room. By the time I got to the stall, I was crying so hard I could hardly breathe. I was so mad at this song because it was so pretty and so positive and saying how wonderful the world is and I felt like my world was crumbling. I was always thankful that no one else was in the restroom because I really had to let things out. I sat there for a good 15-20minutes trying to compose myself. I finally stopped and tried to regain my optimistic mindset, and said to myself, if a song this beautiful could be written, things will be ok. The song says, "Someday I'll wish upon a star, wake up where the clouds are far behind me." I left the bathroom praying that those dark clouds would leave me soon and that I would find the other side of that rainbow this guy was singing about.

Thankfully, I never heard that song again until after I found out I was pregnant 7 months later. It was very soon after I found out I was pregnant because it was during the first few weeks when I was most paranoid. I was in my car alone and I was just out running errands, and I heard the first few guitar strums...

It was immediate waterworks. It brought back that horrible moment of sitting in the restaurant bathroom stall sobbing thinking I would never have a baby. But, I turned up the volume and listened. I realized it was the most beautiful song I've ever heard. I also realized that I had wished upon a star and the clouds were behind me. It was the sunnist day. The sun was shinging and it was actually a little warm outside which is odd for late February in NW Indiana. And I knew everything was going to be ok. Would you believe that Rich and I heard this song on our ride home from the hospital with Tommy? (I cried, but it was a good cry!)

Trying to start a family through pregnancy or adoption can be excrutiatingly difficult for some people. I can name at least five people I see/talk to on a regular basis that unfortunately have to struggle like we did. My heart goes out to these families and I just want them to know that dreams do come true just like the song says. You just have to find the other side of that rainbow.

So...to all my devoted blog-reading friends out there, please turn the volume up, listen to this beautiful song, and say a prayer that those clouds will clear up and more dreams will come true.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!